by Craig Hysell

My CrossFit Open could easily be labeled as a disaster on paper. My scores are dismal. Bottom of the barrel at scaled. Purely awful for somebody who’s been at it since 2008.

I’ve never been great at the sport of fitness, but I’ve never been this terrible either.

I can choose to let my scores crush me or create me.

See, going into The Open, my back had been compromised due to my pelvis shifting several months ago and me being too proud or too dumb to realize that finding a real solution to the issue was more important than training through it.

I walked the line and fell off the wrong side.

I accept this. I make no excuses. It was my bad judgment and the consequences do not debilitate me psychologically.

My body is weak, but my mindset is strong.

During 17.3 my score was 6 reps. Squat snatches were simply too stupid for me to do regarding my recovery and my current mobility status even at scaled weights.

BUT, I was actually PROUD of my score.

Six reps showed restraint, wisdom and my ability to see the big picture. Something that would not have happened a few years ago.

I have no desire to go out and win The CrossFit Games, therefore I never will. I don’t train like I should to compete at the highest level. I accept this without complaint and acknowledge that whatever score I get is the one my training has earned me.

I really do love training (No matter what, I train. I train around my setbacks when I can’t train through them.) but I don’t need to “win”. I simply need to learn. Which I do every day.

When I’m comparing me to me, I know with one hundred percent certainty that I am growing as a human being, even if the score says something different.

On the Open Leaderboard, I’m a disaster. I’m a joke and a “loser”. On Life’s Leaderboard I’m self-aware, happy, challenged, strong in mind, coming back in body and ready for the next set. Right CT? I’m PR’ing every day. I’m content with that.

Would you be?

Live with Conviction.